So this morning, my husband, Ash, was 33 minutes late for a coaching session with 80 people! Apart from the fact he was tripping up all over himself to get to where he should have been all along–which was the least of his worries–is that he showed himself up to be the opposite of what he preaches every day.
As a leadership coach, he has people counting on him to not just teach leadership but to show what leadership looks like in practice. And today, he just bombed!
It’s Important to Realize When We Mess Our Priorities Up
Why am I telling you this?
Firstly, although Ash and I talked behind closed doors together about what has caused his behavior–which we’ll get to in a moment–we also feel that there’s an important lesson here for everyone about prioritizing your life while building your empire, career and goals. And although Ash and I are leadership coaches, the reality is sometimes we mess up. As much as we shouldn’t if we’re living what we teach, stuffing up does give us the opportunity to learn from our mistakes and help you identify ways you can improve your own lives.
What’s Distracting You, Causing You to Have False Priorities?
So, who’s been on the new Clubhouse app? Isn’t it great! It’s an effective marketing tool and used in the right way–just like any other social media platform–Clubhouse can help you make connections and grow your business.
But what Ash found was that it was sucking him in, sucking up his time, causing him to push his other priorities aside. Whether it was because he wanted to work out a strategy for it or because he wanted to focus on our numbers, it sucked him in to the point where he felt an addiction was forming.
I get it. If you learn by listening–and there’s so much opinion to listen to–then it’s really easy to lose yourself in the platform. Some people spend hours on it. Literally, hours! But if you’re spending so much time on it that you’re losing your sense of balance in your life then it’s time to take a hard look at yourself and make some life-changing decisions.
So let me ask.
What’s sucking the time out of you at the moment? Maybe I should ask the question like this. What’s sucking the life out of you?
Whatever it is, it is the right time to put your life back into balance!
Having the Right Priorities Will Empower You
For me, balance isn’t really about harmony because chances are your life is pulling you in different directions, so your life will never be in perfect harmony.
To me balance is about ensuring you’ve got your priorities right for the people you love and depend on you, for yourself (your mind, body and soul) and your future. And that you’ve put boundaries in place to enable you to live a healthy fulfilled life. Trust me when I say your future is not sitting on Clubhouse counting numbers!
You need to have the courage to break the patterns in your life that are no longer serving you! Break those patterns, set your priorities, establish your boundaries and you’ll find that you’ve got more control, which is empowering!
Here’s Why It’s Important to Have the Right Priorities
If you’re like us and have loved ones who rely on you to spend quality time with them, then any behaviours in your life that cause you to focus on the wrong priorities are not right or you.
Here’s another reason why. Your kids will notice. If you set the example where you prioritize sitting on Clubhouse (or any other social media) so that nothing else gets done, or being so involved with work that everything else is neglected, or you’re on your computer or phone for so long that you don’t have time to spend with your family, your kids will notice.
Our son, Zach, even said to Ash “Dad, you’re always on your phone and you said that you would come play with me.“
We just need to be aware that if we display these behaviours that our kids will learn to reflect this behaviour, maybe acting out or by displaying behaviors like watching Youtube movies or play video games all day long.
But as entrepreneurs, just as much as we must keep looking at our visions and seeking to empower ourselves, it’s equally our responsibility as parents to empower our kids by setting wise and good examples that form legacies that span generations.
It’s Easy to Lose Focus on Our Priorities
Don’t get me wrong, just because you set priorities that don’t show you up as the leader you should be, doesn’t make you a bad person. It doesn’t mean you need to be ashamed. It just means you’re human!
There is so much in life to distract us and draw us in away from our priorities. It’s so easy to let ourselves become distracted!
Push Yourself to Be Focused
That is why ensuring you’re focused on your goals, pushing yourself to achieve so you can be present for the people who need you, helps you set your priorities.
Prioritizing Those You Love Gives You Integrity
One of the important things to know about being in any relationship is that you make yourself accountable to the other person. I think I’ve said this before, but by the time you’ve given your loved one flowers the fifth time for the same indiscretion, they’re already over it! By the fifth time, your flowers–or any other gift you use to represent your apology–have no integrity, neither does your apology!
So you need to learn how to partner with the people in your life in a way where you realize how you fall short and how you need to be there in a better way for them. And here’s the reason why. If we don’t, they’re going to mirror back to us how we stand for them.
There’s No Shame in Asking For Help
The other thing I have to say here is that there is no shame in leaning on those who love you the most to help you as you move yourself back into a balanced life. And if you’re the loved one who is helping another person to live within their priorities, then you’re equally responsible for helping that other person move forwards when they ask for your help, as they are for seeking to move on.
Be Intimate With Time
As an entrepreneur, you need to be intimate with time; know what your priorities are and set boundaries to ensure your life has the boundaries you need to be a whole person. As important as it is to grow your business, it is equally important–if not more so–to spend time on yourself as a person and spend quality time with the people you love and who you are accountable to.
As you decipher the patterns in your life and how you should make changes to have a more balanced outlook, you’ll discover that you’re more powerful, not just for yourself but for those around you!