One of the keys to business growth is personal growth. Tapping into this is one of the reason what leads HeartCore Business clients to success.
And a great way ways to achieve personal growth is to release the parts of your personality that suppress it—to sharpen your emotional intelligence.
How do you do that?
Define What’s Hindering Your Growth
Take a moment to think about your personality: specifically, any parts of it you’d like to release … parts of it you’re not proud of, that you’d like to change.
Look at an area in your life that’s emotionally-charged for you, or where you have an emotional breakdown—where you’re not so proud of yourself for the way you’re being, or the way you’re acting or reacting.
Now, let go of any judgment around this situation. Let go of thinking whether you’re “right” in reacting this way, or whether someone deserves it.
Can you see where you are responsible for creating that drama, that emotional charge? This is emotional intelligence.
Typically, removing that emotional charge, growing your emotional intelligence in that area, requires you to let go of all righteousness. It requires you to let yourself off the hook for not being perfect.
Life is not about being perfect. It’s not about being intense.
You’ll know if you’re hanging onto perfection when you start judging people: your spouse, your friend, your parents, your co-workers, yourself. You see, judgment is a great deflector of responsibility.
What if, when you find yourself slipping into that judgment mode, you stopped and looked for the emotional trigger?
The emotional trigger is where your life is trying to grow.
The emotional trigger gives you a window into something amazing that wants to come through! Releasing it gives you control, as you realize that growth.
You’re in Control—and You’re Wired for Growth
But guess what? If you’re in judgment mode, you miss it. If you believe you’re somehow wrong or messed up for feeling triggered, then you suppress yourself.
You are completely in control of changing something—of changing whatever situation triggers you, emotionally.
And if you look at each trigger as an opportunity for growth (which is exciting, right?), then you do grow and change, and release those triggers while realizing more of your potential.
The human spirit loves growth. We’re attracted to it, wired for it.
But when we slip into judgment mode, we squish the growth, and we give our power away.
To change this, we must release the emotional triggers that cause us to give our power away.
Releasing the Triggers
In general, people have negative feelings about “giving up” something.
But giving up the things that don’t serve you—for example, the emotional triggers that stop you from growing—actually allows you to get more of what you want!
Life tests us. Letting go of, or releasing, things that don’t serve us is a test. It’s a test for which the reward is something we want.
And here’s where things get tricky: so often, you can’t correlate the test to the thing you want.
For example, in my coaching, my clients may want to achieve a certain result, let’s say, explosive sales. And they’re pushing, pushing, pushing.
They’re very intense and emotionally-charged about making these sales. And I’ll pull them back. Just throttle it back, take some of that masculine energy out of the equation so they can actually receive.
I don’t always use these words with my clients (“masculine energy,” “intensity,” etc.), but I guide them through releasing the emotional triggers that cause that intensity, so they can actually receive.
Over the course of today, this week, or even the next couple of weeks, grab a paper and pen and brainstorm about your emotional triggers. Dig deep and recognize where you’re responsible for them.
And then take it a step further, by asking yourself what you’d have to give up so that you don’t experience this trigger again.
Then take it just one step further, by actually giving that thing up. Maybe it’s a certain relationship, a result you want in your life, whatever. Give it up for two weeks, 14 days.
And if that seems like too long, then give it up for seven days. And you can recommit for the second half a week from now.
See what happens in your life!
A multitude of things will change quickly, because our lives are mirrors of what we’re putting out.
For example, if you’re meeting crappy men, then stop being whatever they’re attracted to. If you meet unavailable men, then stop being the woman they’re attracted to.
If you’re not making the type of money you want, then what do you need to give up to be able to make that? Do you need to give up a bad business coach and invest in a good one?
Do you need to release one or several of too many projects you’re working on? Do you need to release some of your work and hire an assistant?
Whatever it is, release it. When you do, you’ll get more of what you want.